Wanna see my fish tank?

On the way back from Albuquerque, I noticed this sign (not my photo, unlike the Continental Divide, I didn't know this was coming to be ready to stop for it, and this really wasn't a very stop-able section of I-25):

Speeding by at 80 mph, I'll admit the only words that really caught my eye were VERY LARGE ARRAY. I'm also going to go ahead and admit that I found and still find this incredibly funny. It turns out that this is a very spiffy (and legitimate) radioastronomy site, but in my super mature mind, it just sounds SO dirty. Similar to how I imagine "protonate" sounds to my college roommate. Hey baby, wanna come and see my VERY LARGE ARRAY?

Which brings me to a couple of sort of related stories that really ought to be shared.

Freshman year of college, during welcome week, they had a seminar all about sexual health and safety - date rape and such. That's where they gave every freshman a rape whistle, which I (and many of my friends) still have actually. I went to this with a bunch of the girls from my floor, and a couple of boys from the 3rd floor of my dorm. One of these guys had gone to an all-boys, Catholic school, and was VERY conservative. Quite possibly the funniest part of the entire experience (except from the part I'm getting to, of course) was watching him squirm through the entire presentation, extraordinarily uncomfortable and embarrassed. I'm pretty sure any mention of anything related to sex would have made this guy uncomfortable, forget when sitting with a handful of girls.

Anyways, the woman giving this presentation, is trying to convince us that guys will say just about anything to get you back to their room, and that their intention is to have sex no matter how unrelated whatever they just said. The example she gave? If a guys asks you if you want to come see his fish tank, he really means, come back to my room and have sex with me. This instantly became a standing joke among the entire freshman class. You could walk through any freshman dorm, and find some variation of, "Hey baby, wanna come in and see my fish tank?" or, "Large fish tank inside," written on the dry erase board on any number of doors.

The other story is from one of my college roommates. She works on a college campus. I don't remember the exact setting, or all the details, but they were looking at sexual health videos for one reason or another. One video was to encourage condom use, and it presented a scenario in which you (a female) have gone home with a guy (whom it seems you've just met at the bar, apparently we're ignoring the poor decision you've already made), and you're trying to figure out how to tell him you want him to wear a condom. What does the video suggest you say? "I think you'd look good in ribbed."

Here's where I take a page out of my sister's book, because I don't know what to say about that besides O.M.G. I laughed hysterically over that with my officemate, and again at home with my roommates.

Why is sex so damn funny??